Hillary Clinton dies and goes to Heaven where she meets St. Peter. She notices that there are clocks everywhere. She asks St. Peter why there are so many clocks here. St. Peter tells her that each clock represents a person on earth and that every time a person tells a lie, the clock ticks off one second.
St. Peter explains that the one clock has never moved because it belonged to Mother Theresa and she never told a lie her whole life. The next clock belonged to Abraham Lincoln and since he only told two lies his whole life, only two seconds had clicked.
Hillary asks, "Where is Bill's clock?"
St. Peter says, "Bill's clock is upstairs in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."